Secret City tour - UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL

You must check your prejudices, your judgement and your old, outdated learned behavior modes and leave your bossy adult at the gate.

Here is where you will also be screened for Covid, fire arms, or/and or toxic thoughts and intentions. By crossing this gate, you agree to comply with the rules and regulations as like outlined in the mayor’s speech.

This is also where you can buy your ticket if you haven’t already. If you have however, our groundbreaking, state-of-the-art scanning system will detect it, and you’re free to come in. If you haven’t - this is an opportunity to do so now, as well as make an additional donation to keep the city growing.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400

This is our fundraising station! This is where you can get your refreshment, your food items that you most likely have already consumed during the reception.

A variety of items are available - please talk to our Deputy about the menu details as well as our Mood Minister about our trusted uplifting desserts.

Venmo, PayPal, Credit Cards, cash, bitcoins and gifts are accepted and expected.

Our recreation center offers fun for all! In it you can relax, take a swim in our under-watery lit swimming pool, while carefully being watched over by our lifeguard Cody. All ages and all species are welcome!

You may be asking: why a swimming pool in this cool autumn weather? And the answer is - it’s not autumn in Secret City. Secret city hosts all seasons at once.  You, the visitor, you the citizen, choose your own season. 

Here, you can also enjoy a variety of cocktails from our bar, or you can experience the challenges of the climbing wall next to it. Just make sure you don’t attempt to climb the wall drunk! However, if you’re doing so - just like Cody looking over the babies currently enjoying the cool water splashes at the swimming pool, three other lifeguards, Ryan, Ben and Mitch are keeping their eyes on you. 

Do not feed the iguana! 

You may press the blue button to make the cool blue lights blink in the tempo of the music.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $500

This is another area of activity for the entire family.  It is also known as ‘the misfits’. You see, back in the day, there was a category of creatures commonly referred to as the misfits. The misfits were typically beings who would, for one reason or another, not quite fit within a certain category and would be disqualified, ridiculed, rejected, or in some other way made feel less valid and unwelcomed. 

That category does not exist in Secret City.  Here we see our first race being ready to start and the horses Whisper, Jasmine and Peace at the start line. But look more carefully and you will see a unicorn facing the other direction, also ready to compete, and is allowed to, even though he’s facing the other direction. 

Inspired by this wonderful scene, many other animals have lined up to participate in the second or third race, realizing that we are all fitting, we are all equal, we all have a chance And look at the audience observing this race: the family of ducks, with their own misfit headless Swan, the family of ladybugs which initially was a family of seven, but two small ladybug daughters have ran off with other secret citizens. You can see one of

them in the traffic station; she has un-joined the family and is now riding in the back of a car with a spider!

And that’s OK.

Don’t forget do you have an opportunity to place your bets here; talk to the grasshopper at the betting table. But hurry - he is collecting the last ones as the races this is the final call as the race is about to begin.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400

The Ducks or The Geese? Each team led by a human in a boat whose purpose is just to make sure no one falls into the swamp, and/or help them our if they do.

Funny, you might think - both Geese and Ducks have wings. And feet optimized for swimming! And the humans are watching over them? How ironic! Shouldn’t it be the opposite? Are these two humans competing, one called Ducks and another – Geese, while The Ducks or The Geese are watching over them?

Possibly! Remember: there are always two (or more) sides to any story!

INVESTMENT VALUE: $600

Who says the cats hate water? It’s a myth. In Secret City cats LOVE water. 

In fact, all these cats were auditioning to perform on one of the piano stages tonight. Unfortunately, none of these ones won this time around so they’ve decided to take the rest of the evening off and continue relaxing while their relative Ruby The Cat, and their baby enjoy the stage spotlight later this evening. 

Watch three cats enjoying their bath while their guardian cat is providing the cool breeze with a fan. 

Go ahead! Try fanning them yourself.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $300

Once upon a time Hip-Hop was believed to be a product of a very specific, distinct segment of our society. Not anymore!

Watch Justin and Justin perform while accompanied by the back-up singer ladies from ancient Egypt, the bunny rabbits, together with the chicks, who in fact are the children of the Chicken - The Sound Engineer for the show. He has arrived on his Vespa, and is accompanied by Panda The Assistant Sound Engineer who came on a Goat.

And what a diverse audience as well! Oh, such fun. The dragon (twin brother to dragon the pianist, who’ll perform tonight), the humans, the bugs, the fish! Everyone loves J&J!!!

And how about the light show underneath the stage, which helps everyone get even more engaged in joining in the singing and dancing. If you can’t find a spot in the crowded sold-out auditorium, you can follow along on the

video screen floating above them.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $300

In this opera, we hear a female voice embodying all the female voices on the globe, secret and otherwise. She is (they are) reminiscing about love, but unlike what you might expect in a traditional opera, where a female character is expected to die at the end for that said love - in here love is celebrated, lived, and lived for.  

The women in this opera speak about all the loves of their lives, which they have given themselves fully deserved permission to enjoy.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $300

In this performance, the main character, Adam, is presented by a countertenor.  His voice, high (much like a woman’s’) and drunk with passion, sings about his longing for the one he cannot have.  

The alligator car which has brought him onto this stage through the big and otherwise un-crossable sea, is parked in the back, waiting patiently for his master’s lament to be finished, and hoping to be able to bring it home back

home, alive, and relieved.  

Adam has two options: to release his sorrows into the sea and let the waves disperse it into the sea-foam, or diving into the dangerous sea and

finding solace that way. 

In front of him on stage are two barrels of gasoline: might there be a third version of the ending?

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400

Grab your VR headsets and get lost in the other reality. This is a secret city within a secret city. Be mindful of your surroundings as well as your inner depths. What is virtual and what is real? In art the virtual screens just the mirrors?

Dive in and find out.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400

After walking around the secret city so much, you might want to sit down by a magical fountain and enjoy southing harp sounds.

And if you’d like to join in musicianship, you may buy or rent tarps from our lovely Arielle! Or Mia! Or both!

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400

It’s time for a little lovemaking; we can't tell you what’s inside but you can look. Scan the QR code Venmo a decent amount to support our sex workers and watch to your hearts content. Be careful though there are cameras making sure that you’re not abusing or addressing appropriately our sex workers. 

If you’d like you can rub the joystick, and you will know that you’re doing it right if it lights up in bright pink light. 

If you experience a little bit of a lowest back pain from over stimulation, our nurse is right there with you with the medication.

INVESTMENT VALUE: $400